Kika VIII…

Here we go again! I was busy typing my post for my Arabic blog so I didn't have the time to post here. Typing an Arabic blog is not quite as easy because I type it outside the blog website (on LibreOffice's Writer) and post it there because I do have more control over specific formatting issues there. Also, putting images there and typing captions, and sometimes getting stuck in translating into Arabic some English terminologies; All that really require patience and some time. Now, I'm back to the usual (hopefully), so let's get back to Kika and her photo-challenges!
Just before I go on with the post, I'm not sure I did announce this already or not, but just in case I didn't here you go: In case you'd like to check the bubbles set of images which I've created lately, it has been uploaded to Canstockphoto. You can visit my profile by clicking the signature at the end of this post.

Kika VIII

Well, I remember at this level with Kika's photo-challenges, things at home started to get busier and busier on many fronts. So, from this challenge and on, I would say not many new stuff had been created really, since I was in a race with time.
So, the theme for Week 8 was "Multiply." A theme which I can relate a LOT to since I used to work with stroboscopic flash as well as collage and stitching images manually (object panorama sort of thing).

Schizophrenia

The one image that popped in my mind when the theme was announced was Schizophrenia, for apparent reasons! Shot this in 2018 and posted it many times (and enrolled it in some contests as well). Ironically, I didn't upload it to the stocks! I think I need to do that soon (to Mostphotos). As I've mentioned already and for many times, I was quite busy but as soon as I got the chance to work on something, I went on with it, regardless of my vision about it and my assumptions about its success or failure…

تَفَضَّلْ، كُلّي آذانٌ صاغِيَة
(go ahead, I'm all ears)

The funny thing about I'm All Ears above, is that when I did it was aiming to the idea of "multiply" which was Kika's theme for week8, but then realized that it works well as a theme for Retinitis Pigmentosa! However, it was done in March, whereas February is the month named as Retinitis Pigmentosa Awareness Month.
The thing about this shot is, I just did it. Without thinking, without preparations, without any much thought except for the core of the idea itself; Something I usually lack (and it hinders me big time but I can't help it!). I picked my camera and my Sigma 12-24mm lens outside (with a tripod of course) and sat there in front of the table and shot 3 to 4 images, then went back to my room and started to work on the collage - Just like that!
Even though my initial aim when the theme started was to use stroboscopic flash because it was the best candidate for "multiplication", I was actually out of ideas for stroboscopic flashes. Anyway, the idea of having ears instead of eyes sounded funny to me (can't remember if I was inspired by something) and it does include the idea of multiplication here!
Since my Sigma 12-24mm lens does not have much of a shallow depth of field to form a bokeh or that sort of thing, I had to do things manually in Photoshop. In addition to that, I worked on emphasizing the sharpness, contrast, and saturation of the body to stand out more against the foreground and the background. You can already tell the haste of the work by the unshaven face I guess!

Bougasso

It was a nice weather time back in March. Of course, it is spring season (even before the official start of it) but typically this is not the case here. Thanks to COVID-19, temperatures had gone down a bit. Temperatures here on May would already be reaching 45-50 degrees on occasions (and even before May), but this year (and probably the year before) temperatures are just reaching 40s.
Anyway, away with the weather forecast introduction already. My point here was to give an introduction as to why or how I was shooting photos for the bougainvillea trees or bushes in our yard still, in March. In fact, at the moment of typing this in May, they are still there though lost a big portion of its magenta blooms, some magenta still remains anyway.

Cracking Bougainvillea

For a moment there I really wanted to go crazy, just like in the old days (not that I'm sane nowadays anyway but I mean with my processing attitude). Thus, I've tried to do a collage of slides taken for one of the bougainvillea bushes, shooting these slides in HDR (i.e. bracketed then combined for HDR). From there, I went crazy with my toning. However, I've realized the crazy part was not there yet!
As I was working in Photoshop to align the images, as usual, I would try to see the automated process done by Photoshop (it does some good work sometimes!). So, after aligning, I tried the blending and to my surprise, I got something that I've totally unexpected, as you can see above in Cracking Bougainvillea. It's not something that I would upload to the stocks for sure, but it is beneficial for my brain I guess to get out of the norm and do crazy stuff; Stuff that people "usually" maybe hate and do not consider as photography. Maybe as a reminder that I'm an artist after all and photography is an art. 

Reaching Out

So, after doing Cracking Bougainvillea, I didn't find myself satisfied enough. Mainly here because the shots I've taken there were kind of random in various directions. So, I went back to shoot it again, and this time I've worked on moving the camera vertically only. Worth noting that both shooting were done with my Rokinon 8mm fisheye lens.
Again, with Reaching Out, I tried to get out of the ordinary and do some art and I did a "trick" here which I didn't do in a long time (I think I've done it back when I had CS3 or CS4 of Photoshop!). Ironically, I've done it also to a picture of bougainvillea, but back then it was a full tree (we had quite a suitable space for planting then). Again, like I've stated in the previous post when I was working with the pastel-like look, it seems that it would have been far better to work with such effect when the shadow was minimal or non-existent altogether, since it is making the isolation process quite troublesome; As well as the looks.

Moon's Delight

Orangina

Beside these 2 shots there were some minor shots for some flowers but I thought it would be just unnecessary to talk about them in detail, since they are simple macro shots with the usual editing process, but I'll just post them here to keep up with the "time-line," since I'm recollecting my photo-shooting memories from months ago!

Finale

It seems that I've been going through some dormant phase lately, as bed seems to be my best friend. Or maybe it is a trial to escape reality. Ramadhan is over now and I'm trying to get back to normal life schedules as before. My work with the camera is low as well and things just feel empty. Or maybe it is me who is empty. I just don't know.
Things seems to be on the way to be back to normal here after more than a year of closure and being off work. To be honest, I kind of used to this life of not going to work every morning, despite the hectic habits and sleeping times which I need to put on check. I feel that I'm still not ready to go back to work whenever they would call me to it. As things go in that direction, I'm also working on getting proper reports for my eyes condition, and who knows, I might as well file for medical retirement. Moving to a new location further away from home, as well as being sort of alone in that workplace which is supposed to be about science (but not much science in it) makes my anxiety ascend further. I just don't know where life is throwing me into, but all I can do is lay my trust in God…

RP Go Leor…

Well, I'm officially stuck in a rut. All I'm doing right now or thinking about right now is taking selfies, and putting other projects behind my back (well, beside doing a post for my Arabic blog). Megalomania? Not really, but it all initiated with the Schizophrenia project which I talked about last post, this is beside doing a project for this month, February, as it being the Awareness Month for Retinitis Pigmentosa and I'm used to do a shot every year for this occasion. I even designed an icon with a purpose, but nothing official about it but only some ideas. Let's talk about these a bit shall we?

Iconography

This is actually an old idea that I had in my mind, as I used to ask myself: What if we, people with Retinitis Pigmentosa, do have a special sign to make people aware of our condition as we go around, either walking (or even driving though it's dangerous)? I know though that where I live, people are close to savagery and probably won't care much about such a sign as they didn't care before for traffic signs and related stuff. But would people in other (normal) places would consider such a sign? Care for it? Considered something official? Such thoughts came back to me as I was tickling my mind to think of a substitute for my ideas for shooting something for RP (since I couldn't find a blind-cane in the WHOLE country). Thus, it was time to work!

RP Icon/Sign

The idea of the icon is simple: An eye (inside a frame) with two vertical bars cutting through the body of the eye signifying the limited sideways vision or peripheral vision. However, RP has various levels of course and some patients might be legally blind; so, I'm not sure if this icon would really be adequate to represent them. I've used blue-yellow combination here depending on contrast relationship between the two colors on the color wheel. Thinking about it now, I might as well upload it as a vector to some stock websites but I would need to fix some stuff. The two vertical lines should have probably been thicker and somewhat equal in thickness to the outline of the eye. We'll see about that later. I think the outer border as well should be considered in terms of thickness to match the eye. Would I live to see this sticker hanging on someone or stuck to some car? Maybe…

RP Blend

As you already know probably, and as I've mentioned before already, I had to cancel my main idea for this project about Retinitis Pigmentosa (RP) Awareness Month, because I couldn't find a blind-cane or stick with any major provider for medical supplies. NOTHING, in the whole country. Of course, I could have ordered it online, there are a plenty out there. However, this will take a long time relatively for the delivery, besides costing so much in shipping for such a simple item like this! Thus, I had to go around this problem and create something new. Well, not exactly new, but let's say an old idea with a different scope…

A post shared by TJ.Photography (@tj_q8) on Feb 10, 2018 at 6:16pm PST

Road of Hurdles

Peripheral Damage

I'm posting the image from my Instagram page so it would be easier to view and check the B&W version instead of posting them both here. Anyway, as I said, the idea is old but the "vision" is new let's say. The idea is similar to last year's Peripheral Damage somehow when I photographed my eye from inside a snoot. The idea is about the limited peripheral vision which RP patients like me have (and some patients do go blind completely as time goes on). For this shot I've used my chess board (no, not a chess fan and I don't like it and I don't play it and I would never ever think of playing it) - It is a set that I've purchased a year or two ago specifically for that purpose. In fact, a friend of mine has more elaborate set with pawns or pieces (or whatever) made of metal and are closer to the human figure. However, I got this set so I would stop borrowing stuff from other people!

The process of shooting was problematic and I had to do a lot of trial and error and it was not possible to shoot it alone. After some help from my brother and my sister, Ive finally managed to pin the focus and the composition. The final composition, though, had to use some crop to remove my forehead which I could not hide whatsoever! And truth be said, all trials had my eye dim somehow and lacking that luster. That thing had to be fixed in processing the RAW files and then in Photoshop. The thing I'm worried about so much is the noise level which seems so robust to be removed with my typical approach in noise reduction plugins. Right after finishing this little quickie project, a new idea struck my head and I started working on it right away. This idea was in fact inspired by a previous project, Schizophrenia, which I've talked about in my last post.

A post shared by TJ.Photography (@tj_q8) on Feb 12, 2018 at 6:20pm PST

The Walk of RP

Despite its simplicity, though, I did have a struggle with The Walk of RP and I had to shoot it on 2 occasions (on 2 days). Going around with the speedlite, I've found out that fitting the speedlite with a globe diffuser on the camera did provide the unique, spooky and mysterious look I need. I tried to pin down the focus the first time (as I was using Voigtländer 20mm lens which is a semi-automatic lens) by estimating the distance to my face. However, on the first day, all shots were actually blurred! It was so upsetting (however, I used some of those for 3D anaglyphs later on). On the next day (I remember that I've overslept after fixing my alarm on the wrong time, so I skipped work and used that time with my camera), I tried again but this time I was forced to use the external monitor to check the focus more precisely.

A post shared by TJ.Photography (@tj_q8) on Feb 17, 2018 at 6:26pm PST

Werewolf

Eventually out of these shots, later on, I've extracted few stuff. I was aiming at creating a 3D Anaglyph at first but then I thought, why not doing this thing as a regular image on its own. Thus, I've created Werewolf and in both, colors and B&W. I've done various things as well with those infrared images (specifically the Schizophrenia project) but let's skip that for the moment, as it is only a change in colors and looks. Maybe later. But let's see one 3D example…

A post shared by TJ.Photography (@tj_q8) on Feb 18, 2018 at 6:20pm PST

And I've made a handful of those anaglyphs, and still aiming to do more in the future. After emailing some stock websites it seems some of them do accept such art, so I thought I might put this forward and try to do more 3D anaglyphs to upload. I just need the good subject though.

A post shared by TJ.Photography (@tj_q8) on Feb 13, 2018 at 6:21pm PST

Behind The Scenes

one of the blurry shots taken on the first day merged into an anaglyph!

Finale

Well, seems things will be getting busy the next few days, but there is no trace of hope for my Scopa project. I've gone through a a "sorting meeting" with the group which was to sort and pick images for the upcoming contest, Austria's International Photography Contest, or commonly known as the Trierenberg Circuit. I was kind of disappointed to see one of my panoramas which I'm proud of beside a single shot to be just dropped down and for somewhat absurd reasons not related to composition or quality. Thus, I might consider uploading them separately on my own. This is not because I do encourage or like contests, but this panorama and that single image have so much in it; something cultural and a heritage, thus I want to show it to all.
On the other hand, I've been somewhat disappointed by some behavior on Instagram, as I see many of my so-called "friends" and members of the group do give Likes and comments generously to others but not to me, the one who posts daily. Most (not all) of my Likes are actually given by strangers who probably searched using a specific hashtag or maybe visitors from Explore? If my images made it there anyway (not sure how an image would be displayed there). I think I need to adjust my behavior online, and I'm starting that off by giving Likes for Likes only.
Some poetry are sparking a little in my head but I didn't get the chance to pin down the words. Mainly, I got moved by Werewolf which I've posted above but unfortunately, my mind was so much in a mess to just write anything down. As I'm reading and exploring the world of INFPs (after doing the MBTI lately), there is some emphasis on writing, so I might need to push that further. I do write some thoughts on a daily basis though (and translate them into Irish as a way to practice the language a bit) but that wouldn't be much of a writing, would it? We need poetry there.

Selfies Go Leor…

Well, seems my stalemate is still going on with my Scopa project on hold for the lack of resources (well, models). I'm trying to work on other projects as much as possible, but with the back of rush hours and schools, I'm literally drained out of power every time I'm back home from work and now I need to cope with afternoons naps mechanisms! Yet, this is not the only frustrating thing to deal with, more to come later below.

Schizophrenia

This is one of the ideas I've probably put in a list in my last post. Some idea to reflect the inner struggle, and I was turning around this idea in my head some time before even discovering that I'm an INFP-T type according to some tests. Yet, looking at it at some specific angle, it does look like reflecting on one side of that personality type. Anyway, I preferred to call it Schizophrenia. 

Schizophrenia

The blending work with this work was not a big deal and somehow done quickly (compared to what I used to do with the peeling effect). However, there are a number of mistakes that I've realized after finishing this work, and even after doing my final touches to this little project. But let's first see some aspects of "behind the scene:"

• Four speedlites were used here: Two reflecting from a cardboard below and two bounced off the ceiling. This system is often called the Clam shell lighting.
• To kill the ambient light as much as possible, I needed to use HSS mode to go over the sync speed (shot at 1/400s), at f/8 with ISO 160.
• Technically, my brother is the photographer but since I'm the one who directed everything and all he has to do is press the button, I think I have to say it's my own work ^_^ - Anyway, he is still having a problem with focusing properly!
• Shot using Voigtländer 20mm with B+W 092 Infrared filter. I definitely had to work with infrared here since it provides quite and interesting contrast and looks (and not just turning my eyes blue!).
• I had to satisfy myself in the beginning with the background, which I wished for to be completely black (and black substances are hard to work with in infrared as well).

After finishing with all the work with the camera, it was the time then for processing the images. It was here essentially that I've found out about my mistakes but it would be hard to go back and re-do the whole thing, but let it be a lesson to learn from. 

• Initially, I wanted to show each face on its own, but then I've found myself attaching the eyes together as it looked more proper and smoother in transition in blend between the different faces. This issued the problem with the expressions: facial expressions are not clear for the lack of the eye compliment.
• Among the faces, where I tried to mimic fear, anger, sadness, and absence of mind, I've found myself forgetting about one of the basic expressions: Happiness and smiling.
• Using a wide-angle lens was a grave mistake. I was aiming at cropping the images from the beginning and this is why I used a wide-angle lens (to have more space to cut). However, looking at it now, probably I should have used my 50mm lens for this project. The final finish is actually such a small image that would be barely suitable to be printed on A4 size!
• Despite using ISO 160 which is proved to be my native ISO, yet the noise frequency was somehow higher than the usual unlike the tests I've done! Could it be because of the sensor being overheating? Not sure.

The background here had to be done in a special process, since I wanted to add a dark atmosphere to the scene. I used Lens Blur for the background and added some vignetting to the whole scene as well. The eyes, specifically, needed some push in exposure as well so I dodged them a little to let them shine. This little work now in fact gives me further ideas to think about doing later on as well. Maybe I could have done something extra to this same project, like taking more images and find a way to merge them, with more mouths and more eyes - but then it wouldn't be much about Schizophrenia probably!

Che

I've been fascinated for some time by the portrait done for Che Guevara (the portrait, not the person). I've been dubbing this type or form of art or effect as a Seal Effect, as it resembles somehow the shape of the wax seal when stamped. However, I'm not aware if there is any good name for this, and probably I should just called it the Che Effect! In my previous post, I've posted a selfie which I've edited in a similar way somehow. I'm aware though that Che's portrait is most probably a work of art, meaning not a manipulation for some photograph of him; I'm not really not sure. Anyway, I tried my best with that selfie of mine to mimic the effect with whatever tools I have available for me in PS. 

Selfie Seal

Generally speaking, I think this effect would do better if the selfie is shot with one flash or speedlite; In other words, one-directional light. Techniques like the Low-Key would do better here. It's all about the play of light and shadows, and the dramatic look. However, this is just my own notes about it, and in fact I've tried to work with another selfie (part of the Schizophrenia project above) which was lit on two sides instead of one, and I still did get some reasonable final result as will be shown in few.

Original selfie, which was in fact a
screen capture rather than a saved
file from the original shot!

The Ghost

 I've taken this selfie and with some clicks and effects I've ended up with the desired result. I've found myself forced to use excessive sharpening as well before doing the whole work to provide some enough grains to be merged later as black areas of some sort. Anyway, after finishing the image, I felt there was something missing. Without much feeling about it, I've got into the Liquify command in Photoshop and just started splashing things randomly and the result was something more of... a Ghost peeking at me. Doing such work with my selfies does in fact inspire me to do more ideas with myself, since it's hard to find anyone willing to work with me, even for few minutes. Some suggested to hire a model, which it possible of course. However, under the current circumstances and finances, it is better to be off away from this option for the time being, and needless to say, I do not consider myself a professional portrait photographer and not even someone who has a keen interest in this subject. It is just random ideas kicking in and out of my head and I feel myself compelled to do them. What is amazing about this last work, The Ghost, it did in fact kick in some desire for poetry back and without knowing it I was there typing a poem. Though random probably with scattered feelings, but it was something to be done.

The Ghost.
-
There he was,
and there he is.
A gazing figure,
an apprentice.
-
Pale in horror,
a figure of shame.
Terror, he served me,
by terror, him I tame.
-
Friendly Ghost,
and black is the color.
Timidly a Ghost,
fierce in angst and valor.
-
Opposites rhyme,
only in his caress.
Touching my heart,
set me in abyss.
-
Awful, how he looks,
such a beauty in misery.
Gazer I was upon that,
Alas, in that mirror,
That Ghost was just me.

The poem was also posted on Writing.com, which I didn't use in a long time now. There is a great urge to go back to writing, specially after reading how my typical INFP-T personality would act and react, which I find 95% of it is correct indeed. That personality report did give me some confidence which I was lacking, and restored my image of myself to myself, after believing that I was abnormal in some aspects. But this is who I am indeed...

Finale

There is an increasing feeling of leaving everything and just isolate myself, there in my room, and preferably doing nothing. I'm literally getting tired of everything. As for my Scopa project which I need to finish, and it should be finished with because some people are waiting for the results, I'm so tired for chasing after some people to shoot for this project. Re-doing any shot is a catastrophic aftermath as well, if there is any need be. This rest might include blogging as well; I have to admit that blogging does indeed put some stress on me to finish it in time. Probably I would invest all that time in shooting photos and sleeping! If only I don't have to go to work anyway...
One of the disasters that I've found out lately, as I'm planning to do my Retinitis Pigmentosa Month project, is the fact that in this country NO blind stick or cane is to be found any where by any vendor!!! I was advised to call major pharmacies for some private hospitals and clinics to check with them, but seeing how things did go with some major companies of medical supplies here, I'm not optimistic that I would be able to find any. I have now 2 options, and as we say in Arabic: "The sweetest of them is bitter." Option one, is to mimic the looks of the cane or maybe use a regular cane instead. Second option, is to change my whole idea for this project and try to find some other idea to implement which requires no cane. I'm inclined to pick the second option but I have to think quick. Not sure if brainstorming would do here either. Can you imagine a country with no blind-canes around?! I can, of course, order these, but I really have no time to waste waiting for such a shipment, so I've neglected this idea. However, I might indeed order such a cane in some other time as I find it interesting to train myself using it. After all, I'm a person with some eye disease, and not sure when all that is visual simply stops working for me…